Sear All The Things
Behold! The Searzall® atop the mighty Bernzomatic™ TS8000! Atop a Coleman propane tank. One of those camping ones, right.
Tremble before the face of Almighty Searification! He hears all, knows all, sears all!
His anger must be satiated! Bring forth the victim. Lay him in the ceremonial skillet. We quake with fear and anticipation!
The dread one shines his eldritch gaze on the offering.
Offering accepted! Searzall's purifying fire cleanses the flesh of the victim, its pinkness being transformed into succulent, crispy brownness. The smell is intoxicating!
The ritual is complete, and Searzall returns to his dreamless sleep. Now, brothers, we feast!
Tremble before the face of Almighty Searification! He hears all, knows all, sears all!
His anger must be satiated! Bring forth the victim. Lay him in the ceremonial skillet. We quake with fear and anticipation!
The dread one shines his eldritch gaze on the offering.
Offering accepted! Searzall's purifying fire cleanses the flesh of the victim, its pinkness being transformed into succulent, crispy brownness. The smell is intoxicating!
The ritual is complete, and Searzall returns to his dreamless sleep. Now, brothers, we feast!
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